Regrets

I know I should be in bed already cos I felt quite tired earlier on.

But I'm walking down memory lane (again). I guess everyone of us have our fair share of regrets, our fair share of laughter and our fair share of tears.

I used to have my regrets. But I realised that while I was sooooo focused on looking at that regret, I missed out on the precious things surrounding it.

1stly, time passes. You may come to a standstill in your life when you jus hold on to it and you jus fix ur focus on it and you forgot that time still runs..... so the longer you hold on, the more regret you will feel and the more time you will waste.

2ndly, we miss out on the people who genuinely cared. These people are family, friends and they are people who love us. When we fix our focus on this regret, when we hold on, we neglect them. We forget about them cos our tots are with our regret.

3rdly, the lesson learnt. We become obsessed with the regret that we forgot that this regret is teaching us a lesson in life. We are taught to appreciate things when they are with us, not only when they are gone from our lives. We are taught that nothing can last forever in this world and even the best things may be taken away from us in time to come. We are taught that things do break and the most fragile, breakable thing in the world, is actually our heart. We are taught to learn from this regret so that we live our lives properly and do not have anymore regrets.

I will never regret the things that happened in the past again. Because I believe that letting go of my regrets will ensure that better things will come into my life again. Although I hold on to the hope that miracles will happen, I know its up to God to arrange. And I believe in miracles.

I know eventually God will answer my prayers in the best way He can. Even if it might not be the ways that I wished it would be, or maybe I will not have it at all, I still trust in Him because I know that maybe without wat I wanted, my life would be happier, would be better, would be more fulfilled..... I know God would work out a miracle for me. I am waiting.....

I always use to ask myself "why" things happen. And I am glad that I have come to the stage when I can question "why am I feeling like this?" and "wat can I do to make things better?" And evaluate the pros and cons in allowing myself to wallow in pity and being sadistically slaved to my feelings.

I realise that I am the master of my body and I try - I may not succeed totally in evicting the negative energies and negative tots and negative emotions out of me, because people still do affect me externally, but at least i try my best to stay positive and steady as a rock..... A great improvement from the past where I am easily affected by the emotions, easily affected by anyone in fact......

Darkness wrote:
"It took me a few years before I could say your name again because every mention of your name took my breath away cos it hurt too much. Every tot of you racked my body with pain because I missed your touch, I missed your lips, I missed your hugs, I missed everything about you.

You took my soul. And my spirit is bleeding because your smile, your laughter, your kind words, your beauty - they were no longer for me. My world became dark because you were my sun and you no longer shine for me. My nites became cold because you took your warmth away."

PS: This one song. It tells u everything that I wan to say. Wat about you?